Nicolas Cage is one of the most interesting actors working. He has 103 screen credits released on IMDB, and it’s one of the most wide-ranging catalogs you’ll find for any actor. Some are marvelous, some aren’t and some are something else entirely. So, for three weeks Binge Watch will be devoted to Nicolas Cage—The Good, The Bad and The Ugly. I’ll be looking at 15 of his films, five in each category. Two weeks ago, I looked at five good ones, then last week five bad ones and today I conclude with The Ugly, ones so bad they border on ridiculous. This is actually a shockingly large percentage of Cage’s films.
Since Cage has so many films, and so many that fit into these categories, I’d like to guarantee this isn’t the last time I’ll take on this quest. But, if you have a Cage film you think is an embarrassment, please be sure to drop it in the comments or drop me a line on Twitter @knighthawk7734.
The Wicker Man (2006)
About: This one pissed me off. The Wicker Man (1973) was a decently creepy horror film starring Edward Woodward and Christopher Lee. It had an engaging story, a religious aspect and stuck with me for years after seeing it in college. This Nicolas Cage re-make has none of those things, pairing him with Leelee Sobieski, Ellen Burstyn and Frances Conroy. It’s got a similar story, but it’s a disaster.
About: In this one, Cage plays a Las Vegas magician who can see the future, so naturally he’s pursued by the FBI to help thwart a terrorist attack. Trust me, I wish I was joking about this being the plot, but it’s true. Cage co-stars with Jessica Biel and Julianne Moore, but it goes off the rails quickly. And not that this is the most important thing, but his hair is ridiculous in this.
Bangkok Dangerous (2008)
About: This is another film with horrendous hair. Just, really terrible. Here, Cage plays a hitman in Bangkok who is there to do a series of jobs when love gets in the way, forcing him to abandon the code that made him one of the best in the business. I usually like Nicolas Cage action films and dread romance films. This one is a horrific fusion of the two that I wish I could forget.
Season of the Witch (2011)
About: 2011 was a big year for our boy Nicolas Cage, and not in a good way. The last two entries on here come from 2011, beginning with the medieval wreck Season of the Witch. This one centers on knights escorting a suspected witch to a monastery during the 14th Century. They suspect her powers are being drawn from The Black Plague. So, you know, this has witches, knights and The Black Plague. How could it fail? Trust me, the description is more interesting than the film.
Drive Angry (2011)
About: This is the other on this list from 2011. I’ll also add, as a bonus, that Cage starred in the Ghost Rider sequel in 2011 as well. Again, it was a heck of a year. But this one is a lot. Cage stars as Milton, a vengeful father who is released from Hell to hunt the men who killed his daughter and kidnapped his granddaughter. It’s exceedingly violent and has some pretty graphic sex scenes as well. It’s also completely ridiculous, and that’s before you factor that Cage’s co-star is Amber Heard. Anyway, this is one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen, so it was a no-brainer to add it to this list.
Matthew Fox is a graduate of the Radio, Television and Film program at Biola University, and a giant nerd. He spends his free time watching movies, TV, and obsessing about football. He is a member of the FSWA. You can find him @knighthawk7734 on Twitter and as co-host of the Fantasy Football Roundtable Podcast.