No, it’s not deja vu. There have been some gloriously steaming piles of pure garbage along the way to take our minds off our circumstances for another year. I thankfully look at the bright side of things and happen to know creating a list like this can be a cathartic godsend to film critics like myself. Here is a list of my Top 10 worst films of 2022. Please, don’t say I didn’t warn you about them.
The 15 Worst Films of 2022!
15. I Am DB Cooper
While Ryan Cory brings an undeniably entertaining spin to the Cooper legend, albeit playing the role with intentional small-dick energy, you wouldn’t associate with the brass balls to make the story entertaining, but in a Rob Schneider kind of way. I Am DB Cooper is stretched so thin that the lack of a story here is painfully transparent.
14. The Wrath of God
The Wrath of God (La Ira de Dios) is as much a self-absorbed, pretentious thriller as its God-like, over-the-top villain. The film isn’t smart enough to thrill & not cheesy enough to be a guilty pleasure. Schindel wastes The Two Popes’ Juan Minujin talents here
13. The People We Hate at the Wedding
Raise your hand if you have watched a movie about a woman in her thirties who is sleeping with her boss, married, and has a small child who swears he will leave his wife soon. Check. Raise your hand if you have seen a movie where a man treats his partner terribly and engages in a toxic relationship. Check again. Finally, let me see your hands if you have seen a movie where a woman was dumped by her ungrateful husband and struggles with closure. Yes, you manage to get all three classic tropes in one film. And rest assured, The People We Hate at the Wedding manages to fumble them all.
Bigbug is too concerned with a drum of its offbeat ways than getting to the heart of its story. Netflix’s oddball film is bonkers, for better or worse. Probably worse.
11. Loving Adults
While the script’s manipulation works on a cornball, cheesy level, I was howling by the end. Imagine cadaver dogs leading the police officers to a trail that ends at a lake, watching the main suspect lighting up a floating bomb fire with a dead animal smell in the air, and just walking away without further investigation. All with a narrator’s own subplot, where the detective on the case is telling this story to his daughter on her wedding day? Loving Adults’ narrative has all the backbone of an invertebrate.
10. Marry Me
A similar film, like Notting Hill, succeeded, where Marry Me does not. When you combine that the leads lack any natural chemistry (and a suddenly charmless Wilson doesn’t help matters), Kat Coiro’s film’s sole purpose is to promote J.Lo and Maluma’s album. This isn’t so much a film as an utterly charmless infomercial.
9. Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness
What multiverse did Steve Strange leave the fun in? Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness is Sam Raimi’s dull and utterly humorless entry into the MCU family. Why? It’s simply full of boring unpleasantness. A strange blip in the Marvel filmography. This is a multiverse of Madness? More like lazy, mediocre, and clumsy misguidedness. Filled with expository dialogue in almost every scene (yes, Wong, we can see the shield is down. Thanks for letting us know), Raimi has made a Marvel horror film with dialogue for ten-year-olds that’s easily forgettable.
Liam Neeson has clearly adopted the Nic Cage strategy of never passing on a script he didn’t like. Well, let’s say the man just wants to work. Memory had loads of potential, but Martin Campbell abandoned a genuine poignant unreliable narrator storyline for a drab third act
7. The Bubble
Judd Apatow tried something different in his first-ever Netflix comedy. The man who created a signature comedy style of films full of unfiltered, flawed characters took a risk that failed miserably with his new movie The Bubble. Unfortunately, he remains fearless, his comedies going over 120 minutes long. His latest comedy is a mess of tone, themes, shots, and poorly edited jokes that fall flat. In other words, what happens in the bubble should have stayed there.
6. The 355
Here’s the 411 on The 355 –– it’s a bloated bore.
My issue with Netflix’s The Entitled is not with the sophomoric genre of choice. It’s the cartoonish and excessive amount in a film so clumsily put together. This is a cringe-worthy sophomoric comedy. The movie must be streamed to be believed.
4. Me Time
John Hamburg’s resume for sophomoric comradery is unmatched. Yet, all the charm, laughs, chemistry, and heart we have been treated to in his previous films seem to have been mysteriously forgotten in Hamburg’s latest comedy, Me Time. A collection of lazily strung-together scenes and ideas with zero subtext and are practically laugh-free with an alarming issue of having no purpose. From mixing family comedy jokes like tripping on turtle feces to illogical nonsensical comedy like fighting off a mountain lion with an EpiPen, none of it works or comes close to humorous or even amusing.
3. The Man from Toronto
An utter trainwreck from start to finish. The Man From Toronto is a humorless buddy-action comedy that lacks energy and creativity. No one films (or is caught on camera) a man who looks like the offspring of Telly Savalas shooting up the countryside? Witless.
2. Home Team
Only an Adam Sandler production can take Bounty Gate and make the well-documented situation into a children’s comedy. Even worse, the entire script brushes over the subject as if it was a misunderstanding. Home Team is very loosely based on a true story, even if it’s inspired by it. It’s a comedy with zero laughs because it has absolutely no jokes. It plays out like a lame character study without any direction when you combine a total lack of discernible plot. This is like taking Koyla (1996) and watering it down into Big Daddy (oh). That film is a classic compared to this.
1. Jurassic World Dominion
It’s almost shocking how little thought and care was put into what is being billed as the end of the Jurassic era in film. In that rare action-adventure film where the special effects-laden creatures outact the cast, Jurassic World Dominion is so poorly thought out and written I may call it remarkable. It has no point in existing other than two things. One, finally giving franchise veteran actor BD Wong a chance to make it to the film’s third act without disappearing. The other is just for humans to make the same mistakes over and over and over again. You never thought it would be possible for a collective rooting for Blue and their offspring Beta to kill off the cast because that was the one thing I held onto to get me through to the merciful end. If you’re looking for a mindless way to pass the time, Jurassic World Dominion fits that definition all too perfectly.
What were your picks for the worst films of 2022? Let us know in the comments below!